Category: Love

Open Mic Night

JohnnyO (on the right) and friends

Living a good life over fifty is a jigsaw puzzle of varied shapes and sized pieces.  Each piece represents something important to us, a person, activity or belief. These are the things which fill our lives.  If you look around my little webpage you will see I have broken these down into five basic areas. Love, laughter, security, health and creativity.  Each of us will weight these differently but I absolutely believe that a good life over fifty has some attention to each of these subjects.


For instance, you could be an amazing cake chef, turning out incredibly detailed cakes that blow the mind, but if you don’t take care of your health you won’t be feeling much like baking.  In turn, you could be the greatest money manager of all time, chocking up record returns that beat all estimates, but if you don’t pay attention to your significant other, you could soon be counting the returns of loneliness.

I have a passion for music that has kept my creative life full of positive vibe.  (get it…”vibe”) I play multiple instruments including guitar and piano, I write songs and sing.  Although I have tried to make money in music over the years I have long given up the money making drive in return for the “filling the soul” drive.  Music makes me smile, gets my blood moving and helps me be creative when I write and perform my own music. Plus, it is just plain fun. Every Thursday night I meet up with a herd of musician friends, and some other great friends who just come by to listen.   It is an open mic format where each person who signs up gets to perform three songs. Without a doubt, this is the highlight of my week. There has to be something really big going on in my life for me to miss open mic.  

Another aspect of open mic night for me is that I have marketed myself to my friends as a sideman, or a supporting player.  If you are singing and playing guitar, maybe you would like a second guitar or a slide guitar or a harmonica. Since I play a number of different instruments, I can cover a lot of ground.  Last night I got to perform eleven different songs with four different people. This is close to heaven on earth for me.  

One interesting thing occurred to me several weeks ago.  I thought about the friends I have in life, and then I sorted out the ones I see most often and do things with most often.  Guess what? You already see it don’t you? The friends I spend the most time with share my creative music hobby. That’s not to say I don’t get together with others, but easily ninety percent of my friend time is with music folks.         

What is your creative hobby or passion?  If you say you don’t have one you aren’t looking hard enough.  My Dad’s creative hobby was woodworking. He loved to make small furniture like bathroom vanities and bookshelves.  He made little note clips that sat on the table and he cut out and painted an untold number of those small wooden cats that sit on top of your door frame.  My 92 year old mother played the piano well into her 80s and even with her dementia and Alzhiemers she can still bang out Dixie upon request. Amazing that she can’t remember what she had for lunch ten minutes ago but she can still play a song on the piano.

Find your creative passion and nurture it.  If you still insist you don’t have one, I’d suggest you pick something and give it a ride.  I truly believe it will fill your soul and make you smile and feel good. Finds ways to meet up with others who share that passion.  Go to meetup.com and look for groups that share your interest. You soul is calling. How will you fill it?   

Talk to your Children

I have strong feelings about many things.  Not that I am right about any of them, but we all the right to our opinions.  It is said that we love our children unconditionally and they love us the same way.  Is this true? In many families, yes this is true but that does not mean that there are things you can do to improve your relationship with your children.

Now that we are in our fifties, most of our children are young adults.  My three are all in their twenties. They are living their lives and are very busy as your children probably are also.  I believe in the little things like the power of something so simple as spending ten minutes talking with your child each day if they still live with you.    “How was your day?”, “What did you do last night?” These are simple questions that develop little bonds of connection between the two of you.  

I can hear you now.  “My kid doesn’t want to talk to me, they are much too busy.  All they care about is their phone.” Au Contraire, they want so bad for you to interact even if they don’t know it.   Perhaps you haven’t had a simple and honest conversation in a while. It is easy for us at any age to forget about the importance of regular interaction.  It is never too late to reach out.

When I see my kids I make a habit of listening a great deal more than I talk. “How is work going?  What projects are you working on? What is your Boss like?” My parents loved me and my bother and sisters but they didn’t say much that I remember.  I know my Dad was often preoccupied with work and my Mom burned a lot of energy trying to organize everything in her life.

Take a minute today or tonight to call your children and just say hi.   Maybe they will be slightly annoyed but just tell them you were thinking of them.  Call them again next week. If your child doesn’t respond right away, don’t give up.   Be persistent. That persistence is your love reaching out to them. The act of reaching out with rub off on them and before you know it you will be hearing from them.